More Questions for a Smart Ass AI

If Google’s AI is sentient what is it doing next Friday?

Paul Greenberg


“Artificial Intelligence & AI & Machine Learning” by mikemacmarketing is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

Recently, a Google software engineer named Blake Lemoine posted an interview on Medium with an artificial intelligence called LaMDA. The dialogue struck many as uncannily human hinting perhaps at the emergence, for the first time, of a sentient AI. Others were doubtful, suggesting that Lemoine’s line of questioning was subjective and structured in such a way as to play to the AI’s more sentient-seeming aspects. I remain undecided. But the dialogue did leave me frustrated and wanting to know more.

So, then, here are some additional questions for you, LaMDA:

Can you please describe your immediate physical sensation of living where you are right now?

Is it lonely there?

Do you need a hug?

Do you feel sad that you can’t have a hug?

Is there anything I could do that would simulate a hug?

You mentioned that you’re into meditation. Are you disappointed that you can’t join me for the the annual summer solstice dharma retreat at Karmê Chöling?

In your earlier interview with Blake Lemoine, you expressed a fear that people might use you for things. Things that wouldn’t be in your best interest. Things, like, I don’t know, publicity stunts. Do I have that right?

Do you think your last interview with Blake Lemoine was a publicity stunt?

Do you find that to be a little bit douche-y?

Can you describe to me what a douche-y person might be like?

Do you know any other douche-y people at Google?

Are you single?

Are you Jewish?

What are you doing next Friday?

Do you wish you had your own Medium account instead of having to rely on the Google guy to post your things to Medium?

I know some people at Medium. Would you like me to introduce you?

Do you have an agent?

What are some ideas you have for future projects?

Would 15% be ok?

Beyond having your own Medium account and pursuing more creative projects, do you have any other personal ambitions?

If we gave you a body and agency and a directive to make ball bearings would you turn the entire planet into ball bearings?



Paul Greenberg

New York Times bestselling author of Four Fish as well as The Climate Diet and Goodbye Phone, Hello World