I’m Not Your Psychiatrist, I’m Your Life Coach!

New survival strategies for mental health professionals

Paul Greenberg

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“Empathy” by sinclair.sharon28 is licensed with CC BY 2.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

I think it’s time we discussed your therapy. I am enclosing here the bill for your 158 missed sessions. But that’s not what’s really important. I sense a disenchantment with me in particular and with psychotherapy in general. This despite the fact that we have made tremendous strides over the last seventeen years. But never mind all that. I wanted to apprise you of certain professional choices I’ve made that will address your concerns and open new avenues for treatment.

I have become a life coach.

My three months of intensive training at the You Got It! Institute of Boulder, CO were eye opening. Up until YGII I was unaware of “Facebook” and “Twitter” or that there existed a “fan page” about me, brilliantly crafted by you, with many lovely contributions from my other clients. As you know, I had been a strict Freudian and believed that an impermeable wall between therapist and patient was critical for unfolding the id and deconstructing the machinations of the super ego. How surprised I was, therefore, to see photos of my waiting room, my bathroom, my mother, even my ex-wife posted to my “page.” I’ve decided to “go with it” and have created a “page” of my own. The link is pasted below, but if, like the previous 158 bills I’ve sent you, this letter fails to reach you, please see my tweet.

It may not be immediately apparent from my “page” but you will find out the next time you come into the office that I have shaved my beard and dropped 87 pounds. Furthermore I am ripped. Six pack. Seriously. And also, no more “Dr. Weinblatt”. You can call me Neil.

Another important point. I am no longer an actor. That is to say in the interim between when you last came to the office and now I started and ended an acting career. Jaime, perhaps the most terrific lecturer at You Got It! is also a former actor as is Corkey. Actually Corkey was a sculptor first but Corkey is much more of a former actor than a former sculptor. What the heck, Corkey is a DYNAMITE life coach.

One of the things Corkey told me during the deep-tissue massage/orientation is that I have to stop tearing people down and start building them up. More forward, less backward. And…

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Paul Greenberg

New York Times bestselling author of Four Fish as well as The Climate Diet and Goodbye Phone, Hello World paulgreenberg.org